A week of silence...

I've done this mother gig for almost 9 years....I don't know what sleeping in feels like, I do know what it is to wake up and find jelly on the counters, half a loaf of bread missing, and spilt koolaid, milk, or juice. I have become and expert at yelling from my bed "SHUT YOUR DOOR AND TURN THE TV DOWN" at 7am, I don't understand the word silence, or those who actually enjoy it. When I left for Austin, I wanted to give my kids a sense of normalcy. Divorce is hard enough, but, having three little ones passed from one house to the next every weekend sucks..my boys could never really adjust to that life. In Austin, we're so far away, they spend 90% of their time with me, in their home, with their cats, with their toys, in their beds, and eating all my food. Unfortunately, moving 7o0 miles away also means that every spring break, 45 days in the summer, every other Thanksgiving, and a week at Christmas is to be spent with their father--it doesn't bode well with me. 

My ex-husband is a straight up douchebag...and I say that in the kindest way possible. Our marriage was never built to last, but, after three children, the least he could do is be a good father. His priorities have always been questionable--coming from a poor family, growing up being taken from apartment to apartment, and even being homeless for awhile, one would think he would want a better life for his children. I in no means make oodles of money (wouldn't that be fabulous), but, I have always made sure that my boys are taken care of--clothes fit and are tidy, hair is combed, nails are cut, there is always a secure roof over their heads, a bed to sleep in, toys to play with, and cats to abuse. Their father, on the other hand...would rather spend his money making sure he has the latest Nikes, fancy jeans, televisions sets, and game systems. He moved in with his girlfriend before the other side of the bed grew cold--shoved her down the kids throats--they were in no way ready to move on. It's been two years since our divorce, and he has still yet to make appropriate accommodations  for his children. Three growing children share one room--and one very uncomfortable futon. As an adult, and ok, I'm a bit on the fluffy side, but, I can't think of a more uncomfortable place to sleep--other than possibly a lion or bears den, but, that's for the mere fear of being eaten...again, I'm fluffy and would make for a fabulous mid hibernation snack. 

I understood the one bed situation at first...and I should mention, the kids have actually UPGRADED...before they slept on an air mattress. It's been two years..TWO years, enough time to stop by Big Lots (total plug, maybe the CEO will see this and send me stuff) and get the boys a bunk bed. I understand there isn't an IKEA in El Paso, unfortunate--but, there are PLENTY of beaners selling beds in the back of trucks, on the side of roads, in consolidation stores, and lets not forget, Furniture Factory Wharehouse...those in El Paso know the ad, know the song, and now like me, have it stuck in your head. What I'm getting at...he doesn't have an excuse to not have beds for his children. The BEST was the ass asking me if I could send him some extra clothes because he didn't have any...again, he should have all of this established for his children. In a "normal" situation, most can send clothes with their children and will have all items returned. In my case, I have had so many item stolen and lost by him, I can't trust him with anything. In fact, he lost Zach's winter coat over Christmas, still hasn't returned it or even paid for a replacement...had the audacity to tell me I needed to get him a new one. Long story short, he's an idiot, and I still pay the consequences. 

This is going to be a long week...and although I did enjoy going out to dinner and seeing a movie for the first time in 10 months, I miss the pitter patter of feet on the stairs, pulling Ryan and Zachary off of each other, finding my cat in the ice box, and hearing "I love you, mommy" before they go to bed. I'm not used to the silence and I'm going a bit stir crazy--poor Michael is going to have his hands full trying to deal with my entertainment expectations. I will grow bored, as I already have. I've been told to take advantage of this time and relax, but, knowing my kids are sleeping on a futon, with a man whose iq is equivalent to soap scum, and that my children are exposed to that stupidity, it's virtually impossible to relax. 

Till next time...

Peace my bebes...

Andria